Love is one of the most widely embraced and cherished concepts in human culture. It’s a common theme in songs, novels and movies, and it’s even a major topic of scientific research. Yet, despite its broad definition and ubiquity, there’s no single, comprehensive explanation for what love is or how people experience it.

Scientists and psychologists aren’t even in agreement on whether love is an emotion. Some believe it’s a physiological drive, similar to the hunger for food or thirst for water. Others see it as a complex mixture of primary emotions, while still others argue that it’s distinct from them and has its own unique properties.

Many of us believe that we can “fall in love” at first sight, a feeling triggered by a jumble of chemicals in the brain that includes dopamine (pleasure), adrenaline (fight or flight), and norepinephrine (alertness). This is why your cheeks flush and your palms sweat when you meet someone who you’re interested in for the first time. As feelings of attraction and attachment develop, dopamine is replaced by oxytocin, the “cuddle hormone,” which helps you feel close and secure with your romantic partner. Intimacy and commitment are also a part of this stage of love, which is why a relationship may feel so special.

Other types of love exist. Some are platonic, such as the kind of love between friends and family members or the love of a pet or hobby. Some are sexual, a desire for power and status, or religious or spiritual love. And some are selfless, like the loving sacrifice of people such as Martin Luther King Jr., Mahatma Gandhi, Maya Angelou, and Oprah Winfrey.

When you fall in love, you start to think about your new love all the time. It becomes a dominant theme in your thoughts, and you might find yourself rehashing conversations over and over again, planning your next date days ahead, or even daydreaming about the future you two will share. You may not be able to control these feelings but there are ways you can make yourself more attractive to your partner to help them fall in love with you.

For example, try putting more attention into your appearance by ensuring you’re well-groomed and looking your best. You should also prioritize your health by getting enough sleep and exercise, eating a balanced diet, and practicing positive mental wellness. Finally, you should spend more time with your loved one and let them know how much you care about them. Take them out on dates, try new things together, and listen to what they have to say. These small acts of kindness can all add up to create a beautiful, lasting connection.